Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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