A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
