You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Randomize