i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize