Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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