I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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