why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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