wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
