Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
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She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
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So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
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