WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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