Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
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