White coat. Heels.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Randomize
