tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
