I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
