i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize