do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
