You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
