she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
