WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
Randomize
