called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I won't apologize to a one balled man
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
