Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
