Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
