Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
