Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize