it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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