remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
