walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
