She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize