she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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