I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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