She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
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it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
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