Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I enjoy the company of your penis
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