I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
