I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
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