real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize