If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize
