Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
