Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I'm having to shit out rocks
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