Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Is it penis luge time yet?
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
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