I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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