I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
