I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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