I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
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