Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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