this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
