i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
