So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
