5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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