as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Randomize
