Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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