I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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